The Philosophy of Gerald by Kieron Black, author of The Goblin's Blue Blanket

Chaos does not come easy for some, or, when it does, it’s an unwanted
entity, something to be banished as soon as possible. An unwelcome
houseguest with no consideration for the feng shui of your
scatter cushions.

For me, the clue is in the name. Scatter those cushions. The front
garden, the bathroom, the roof. A bowl of porridge is a dull, inert
thing. Grey and insentient. But if I take a mad leap for the milk as
you pour, suddenly it’s a living thing, colonising your kitchen floor,
growing, spreading. Then, if I knock the porridge packet over just as
you are cleaning the rest from the floor, we have a beautiful
symbiosis of goblin and mop and rage and oats.

What is a rose garden without poo in it? Pot pouri is just restrained
chaos. Release it. How can one enjoy the beauty of a sunset without a
cat climbing one’s leg? I merely aspire to greater heights, as you do,
though my route is simpler – up your leg.

The tranquillity of an afternoon read ... boring! What if I spill your
coffee, shred your book, knock over your pot plant? Suddenly we are
dancing, running, singing! If I am outside, I want in. If I am in, I
want out. If the door is open I will sit at the window. If the window
is open I will yowl at the door. I see your stacked dominoes – wheat
before my scythe. Your late morning is my early start, your early
night is my late finish. Show me a goblin at his leisure and I will
show you a canvas without a brush.

I am the brush. I am the chaos. I am the Ginger Destroyer and you love me.

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